The Rev. Peter E. Lanzillotta, Ph.D.

Throughout the progression of humanity’s religious quest, there has been either a desired dialogue or a dubious denial of the importance of nature to our religious practices and spiritual imaginations.

On one side, there have been the mystics, poets, philosophers, and artists whose source of inspiration was drawn directly from the natural world. In response to the mystery and majesty of nature, its balance and its beauty, we are given invaluable lessons that we need to take seriously. In the natural world, they observed, there is a visceral wisdom that requires our awareness and our respect. The cycles of weather definitely have an effect on our sense of health and well being and will lead us to acknowledge that nature cannot be divorced from our humanity and therefore deserves an important or central place in our religious understanding and expressions of worship. The variegated petals that unfold to us form around the truth that Nature is a pathway to God- and this pathway is as wide as Pagan festivals to medieval mysticism, from the Native Americans to the Transcendentalists. What they all share, from the flowery verse of Hindu Vedas to Whitman’s earthy leaves of grass, they speak of nature with respectful and reverent tones.

The contrasting viewpoint is that nature is our adversary, that it is something that we, as humans, need to conquer and control for our personal benefit. It declares that nature exists for our social and personal use. If it cannot be overcome, then it had to be dominated or domesticated, tamed or controlled. Often, this outlook falls into two primary camps- the ascetic and the opportunistic. In the first way of dealing with nature, we are to deny any connection to it… That somehow the physical being is bad, that nature is cruel, and life in the body is a harsh ordeal.

This point of view was most vividly championed by the Victorian celibate priesthood and earlier, in this country, it was well represented in Puritan times by Yankee Protestantism with all of its puritanical codes and its capitalistic ambitions. Under this approach to nature, we are to use, to plunder, exploit and harness nature to fit or fuel our desires for progress and for profit. Only then or in that way, does nature have any value for us!

As I have outlined it, it is obvious where I stand… And even though it is not an objective comparison, it is one that operates clearly in our culture today. It is historically factual and its influence on theology has contributed greatly to how religion can be used to support environmental deregulation and it has contributed to the ecological and spiritual crisis we now face.

As this relates to May day, we gain our first appreciation of its origins from the Roman revels of Flora, the goddess of the flowers, and most likely an earlier Pagan celebration that they adopted. Historically, the people of Southern Europe or more temperate climates observed that Spring could easily begin in March. However, if you lived in Northern Europe, or in the Northeastern and upper Midwestern parts of our country, a good claim could be that Spring really doesn’t arrive until May 1st!

But May… Ah, May… Well, we can always hold good thoughts about the weather in the month of May… It is after the cold winds of winter and before the harsh heat of summer…

It is the month of Camelot… the merry month of May when we can celebrate our delight in the flowers and in all greening and growing things…

And so it is, that we derive our best source for the origins of May Day from Merry Old England… Of course!

Many of you already know something about the Celts and Druids. They were famous for many things that later became infused into our modern culture. Among the more curious and phenomenal were the ideas associated with nature spirits, leprechauns spirits, fairies and the like… But we also have the marvels of Stonehenge, and we have the vivid scenes from Shakespeare’s plays that are filled with nature, alchemy and symbolism such as MacBeth’s witches with all their toil and trouble!

More importantly to our spiritual quest, there has been a revival of deep and earnest interest in the divine feminine and in the ideas and practices associated with the worship of the goddess. The classic text, that is almost required reading for those interested in this feminine spiritual outlook would be Margot Adler’s Drawing Down The Moon. What is on major importance for us is that these practices, images and symbols were pre-Christian ( and from what I have observed in the Low Country, they are post Christian) and the central teaching is that we cannot live our lives apart from nature or without a central correspondence to nature as a source of wisdom and understanding. We cannot or should I say, we dare not live hermetically sealed off from nature in our condos and skyscrapers, or training out nature by being constantly plugged in our MP3 players and our smart phones!

In fact, there is now a new malady making its appearance among our youth- a deficit of Nature that keeps them alienated and out of touch with how nature teaches us to live. They are removed from healthy food, exercise, exploration of the natural world, and are living in a largely artificial way! While technology can certainly be useful, it needs to serve our aesthetic and compassionate values, not create them!

The major obstacle to a more full and joyous celebration of  earth based holidays such as May Day, Midsummer’s, Equinox, even Halloween,

Comes from the suspicion associated with them being carnal, being visceral, being joyous… or in short, not being Christian, and therefore evil!

Furthermore, these revels associated with May poles, and bonfires might be demonic and could corrupt your orthodox and pious soul!

And yes, if these festivals are lived out as they are portrayed in Hollywood, they are certainly lascivious and “over the top” and could easily be seen as a corrupting influence on youth and society as a whole. However, most of these rituals and rites are respectful and celebrate the connection of our bodies with our souls, and that our lives are drawn from nature and to give thanks and to be exceedingly grateful that our existence depends on keeping a respectful balance and correspondence to the natural cycles and rhythms of the year…

Another objection to celebrating May day and the earth festivals is simply because… Well, Pagans do it! What is a Pagan? Is it someone like Aristotle, Plato, or Marcus Aurelius- someone who does not believe in a Christian understanding of God? In short, the word pagan has been drastically abused and when it has been employed it is often derogatory and dismissive. Its Latin origins simply meant to be a country dweller in contrast to someone living in walled cities…

The truth is that religion has always taken the ways and rituals for worship from its environment or natural surroundings. If you live among the animals, amidst the trees then these living things can take on a symbolic expression and have a spiritually significant meaning for you. Jesus, Buddha, Mohammed … Almost all the great religious leaders of humankind did not draw their most enduring teaching stories from life in the “concrete jungle”

The parables are filled with natural symbolism… Similarly, the Native Americans looked to animals, birds, and tress, as did the Celts.

However, when the Christian missionaries arrived in Northern Germany, France, and the moved into the British Isles, they were… Appalled to see such displays of joy and celebration! It was so licentious and it was accompanied with heathen drumming, flute playing, and dancing- Horror!

They saw it as their moral duty to root out this decay, and to train people to abandon their bodies in favor on their rational sensibilities…

In doing so, their aim was to break their spirit, and abolish their Myths and symbols. In other situations and circumstances, where the Myth and the cultural observances were deeply engrained, and the resistance was too great, they decided to “sanitize” their festivals and practices and gave them new, tame meanings… From those efforts we have the origins of the Christmas tree, the Easter egg, etc.

So all this review, brings me to May Day, a joyous Pagan Holiday!

Among the Celts and Druids, it was called Beltane, and it was celebrated as part of the wheel of life, one eighth that signals Summer’s impending arrival!

Of course, May day is the more tepid and tame version of Beltane…

Originally, Beltane was a holiday celebrating and encouraging fertility!

And the May Pole… well, its an upright symbol that it to be encircled by flowers. All who wished to be fructified, or to encourage their own fertility  were encouraged to use this time to seed the soil or the awaiting wombs so that there would be a joyful harvest in the coming seasons! Young women would dance around the large trunk trunk/pole and offer signs and songs for fruitfulness- in any way you wished to desire it! Other customs associated with May day were hobby horse riding, Morris dancing, and washing one’s body in the morning dew!

When I was preparing this topic, I purposely spent time in my home garden… While I am usually filled with the ideas of the tasks to be done, this time I stood, and walked mindfully through the rows… As it was, by the time and phase of the Moon, time to plant, I took some seeds and stooped over, make some rows with a hoe, and started to lay out what I hope would be an abundant summer harvest…

As I began the process, I became lost in thought… My mind flashed on how universal and timeless this act of seeding was! Most every year of my life has had a garden in it… Across the generations of my family life, up and

down the rows of humanity, people have planted… Humans have planted their seeds, their hopes and their desires for a million years, and I am but one of the recent ones and it is just my time in the unfolding centuries to take my place, make my effort to grow food for my life …

Suddenly, my reverie ended… And I stood up and was still … It was almost totally quiet …empty… Expectant…

Well, almost quiet until a defiant mockingbird decided to wake me up and bring me back to his particular form of celebration, his enthusiasm seemed to have no bounds! Yet, for a short precious while… I was one with the Chinese rice farmer, the Cherokee planting the early corn, my grandfather putting tomatoes deep into the soil…

Now I could begin to understand how the reverent Celt would have felt when he or she was confronted by the many mysteries of nature and how it enveloped life, and how deserving nature is of our care and dedication. It was a feeling that made me quietly content, serene, happy…

If this is a more enlightened form of what it means to be a Pagan… Then count me in! I am a Pagan, too!

Whether our concern is for ecological integrity or personal peace, try to take some time this May Day to offer someone a flower, a smile, some loving regard… Go for a walk, open up your senses to all the natural lessons, epiphanies and miracles there are to behold…

Take nature into your keeping, and place it near to your heart…

Amen; So Be It; Blessed Be….

A Prayer for May

From Julian of Norwich

There is a treasure in the earth.

Be a gardener. Dig a ditch. Toil and sweat.

Turn the earth upside down, and seek the deepness.

Continue in this labor, [then] take this food…

And carry it to God and to your neighbor as your true worship.

In God’s being is Nature; God is the true Father and Mother of Nature, and all are made to flow out of God to work the divine will.

Nature and God are in harmony with one another.

For Grace is God as Nature is God.

Neither Nature nor Grace works without the other.

Let us never forget our debts to both Nature and Grace.

Our Father/Mother/Spirit God;

You who are the Creator, Provider, Sustainer of Humanity and the Natural World, we offer our praise for the beauty of the earth, and all that is nature that surrounds us. We affirm that both Nature and Grace are our gifts from the Creation, and that we are to be the willing and grateful stewards.

As we respect our bodies, we respect the animals and all that lives alongside of us and that shares this planet with us.

May we never act in arrogance, but always seek to live in balance , in praise, and in peace. AMEN

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PRELUDE: Gregorian Chants

Cover Quote:                                     Lent

Lent is not a negation. It is an affirmation of life’ positive values, its treasures.

Lent is not doing without, but it is doing with. It is taking a greater interest in things that have been crowded out in the hurry and worry of every day. It is a time when a church (or a spiritual community) may prove its value as a well, a mine, or a source and as a center dedicated to the enrichment and empowerment of the Spirit among us.

Robert Murray Pratt

(12 readings… We should pick 4-6…)

READINGS FROM THE EARLY CHURCH & AN INCLUSIVE LECTIONARY:

OLD TESTAMENT:   Psalms 103     Isa. 58

EPISTLES/LETTERS  Romans 5:1-5;     14:2-4; 6-8; 10     2 Cor 4: 7-12; 16-18

SYNOPTIC GOSPELS:           Matt 6: 1-6; 16-21; 25-34    and/or  Luke 6

GNOSTIC WRITINGS:  Thomas 70

GLORIOUS KORAN: 7: 199; 24:22

THE HADITH (selected writings of the prophet Mohammed)

SUFI SAINT JAHALUDIN RUMI: There is a Field; Forgive Me

MUSIC ( optional)  Bells or Bowls…. Or a Quiet Guitar or Flute Music…

PASTORAL  GUIDED MEDITATION:   The Jewel and The Ashes

Pastoral Prayer (optional)

SILENT MEDITATION( Chants…)

Homily ( optionalif needed or desired… On Becoming A Phoenix… website)

ANTIPHONY (a shared congregational reading that accompanies the Rite of Ash Wednesday; It is a Sacred Rite in four parts: Intention, Releasing, Anointing, Affirming….)

STATEMENT OF INTENTION:

Left Side or Congregation:

The past is behind us.

Let us learn from it, and let it go …

The Right Side or Clergy:

The future in Spirit and in self are one.

It lies within and ahead of us. Let us

prepare ourselves for it.

But we will not try to live in the future,

not strive at too fast a pace;

“Now is the time of our salvation.”

Life cannot be led or lived in hindsight;

nor can it be truly experienced in anticipation-

only in the NOW of it, which is Holy time.

We shall put the failures and embarrassments of yesterday

behind us. They will no longer rule us. We can forget them.

We will put tomorrow hopes in us, and in front of us.

Seeking the precious core of our true being, we intend to live

more graciously and compassionately each day.

For ours is the ability to reflect the Divine, and

it can only happen from the lessons learned and

Experiences we have reconciled or redeemed.

We learn from what we leave behind, from what

we HAD to experience, and from the present things…

what “we suffer to be so now.”

OFFERING/RELEASING:

(Clergy now invites people to participate in the ritual by asking each person

to write a brief description of a past, painful memory on a small paper card.)

As supplies are handed out, the clergy person reminds the participants that

this is a sacred ritual, to be kept in confidence and with non-judgment.

SILENCE

INVITATION TO THE FLAME:

Clergy: Let us seek to redeem the pain of the years, from the burning of the past, we cleanse and free ourselves to reclaim our higher selves. As dross is burned to reveal the gold, as coal becomes the diamond, we can recognize the jewels of wisdom, compassion, truth, and trust within ourselves…

( as guided by the clergy, each person, with their card, comes up and addresses the group, sharing what they had written. Then they light the card from the chalice, and drop the burning card into a large bowl.)

Clergy: Let the pangs of any negativity transform themselves through the fire and the flame separating the gold from the dross in our lives. We do this so that the ashes of our past can become transmuted to become our visible symbol of renewed grace, as a sign that we posses more of a life that is taught by wisdom, and renewed by hope.

Silence until all the cards have burned to ash . . .

ACT OF ANOINTING:  (Ashes mixed with ash of palms, and holy oil…)

Clergy: With these ashes, your past has been released and transformed. No longer are you a prisoner of memory and pain, bondage or regret, you can be free of your karmic debts. No longer dust, you are closer to becoming diamonds.

(Clergy now applies ashes to the forehead of each person)

Traditionally: Man, thou are dust and to dust you shall return….

NEW: You are the dust of the earth that through grace, wisdom, and love,

are always living in transforming grace… And by compassion, honesty,            wisdom and forgiveness, you are becoming  who you are more fully,            more clearly… You are becoming clear light, closer to diamonds…

ANTIPHONAL AFFIRMATION:

LEFT SIDE OR CONGREGATION

:

With this act, the days of our lives become released,

less heavy. Now I am renewed, freed to become more of my true self.

Right Side or the Clergy:

By this act, the future can be received

more openly, freely. The newness and

potential of life can be better known.

Be thankful, for this is Holy time,

because we are best known by God by how we live our lives,

how we savor and serve throughout our days.

Be humble, and thankful, for we will grow

with the promise of these ashes, so that

every day can become more clear, radiant,

and shining with love.

ALL

We have learned from our past; We can be grateful for it.

I recognize its purpose in me and for me: it has been my dust,

my grist and my ground for building within me,

a wise heart, and more spiritual life.

BENEDICTION

[ In this shall you rejoice, that more precious than gold are your tests by fire, and the outcome of your faith, hope, and love shall be the salvation of your souls]“                                                                                                                         I Peter 7; 9; adapted

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Water Dragons, 2012, Awakenings, etc.

As well known Taoist teacher and scholar Michael Winn puts it,

”

Taoists call it Tai Yi, the Great Oneness. It is stepped down into our local Consciousness in 2012 as the Year of the Black Water Dragon.

This Dragon Year chi helps to spiral us back into the core from which we were born. This coming year, according to other astrologers, will bring physical alignment with the Galactic Center. In my experience, the chi shift has already happened, but humans are just a bit slow in waking up to it!

This parallels my observation in my book, Spirit, Time, and The Future, where I affirm that it is not so much a time or a date on the calendar that is most significant but that the potentials hidden within time can be released or engaged in such a way as to promote a personal spiritual awakening, and a regeneration of  hope and courage in making the necessary changes that usher in a cultural conscious change.

As a consensus opinion, The year of the Dragon is a time of ambition, power, and daring. Events seem as if they are magnified threefold with increased intensity. The energy and vitality of Dragon year may make some people overly optimistic. Dragon year is an excellent time to start a business, marry, have

children, and take incredible risks. On a global level, expect extreme earth changes, such as earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, and tidal waves.

According to Gillian MacBeth-Louthan in her recent article (1/13/12) Quantum Awakening

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May we be reminded this Christmas of seeking to fulfill the gift of presence… And how to live out Christmas gifts his year

To be present or have a beneficial presence within our parenting, to be present with our compassion for others, and to be positive and present with any and all expressions of caring for one another…

What is Christmas All About?

Let us affirm, in Mary’s name, that Christmas is all about the gift of love given to all of us; It is about being of service to the child, and to all our children; Its all about being and living as a benefit to all humankind, starting with Christmas and all year long…

The Promise and The Hope

When God wants an important thing done in this world, or when there is a wrong that needs to be righted, God goes about it in a very singular and consistent way… No, God does not release vengeful thunderbolts or disastrous earthquakes to punish or to beset us- God seeks justice, wisdom and compassion.

God simply has a tiny baby born, perhaps to a humble mother and father…

And their guidance, perseverance, and desire to teach and serve, to love and to heal, they put the idea of love and the ideals of justice into that child’s heart. Then God waits…

The great and significant events of this world are not found in recounting the fierce battles, the close elections, or in surviving natural disasters. The great events happen every day, every few minutes, when a child is born…

Each child born comes to us with a message that God is not yet discouraged with humanity, but is still expecting good will to become incarnate in and through each human life…

Thoughts after reading The Magnificat ( Ave Maria passage in Luke…)

One of the most enduring inner lessons we are given from Mary’s life is that we are all to live beyond our egos or any self serving ,personal desires. If we identify ourselves as being spiritual, then we are willing to open our hearts to human need. To the degree that our hearts are open, our actions will be compassionate. To the degree our hearts are willing, we make ourselves ready and willing to receive an improbable blessing…

Because many of our life experiences or relationships or challenges comes to us unexpectedly, or not when it would be convenient, does not invalidate its importance or is value for us. In fact, across the Myths and stories of faith that span all of humankind, it is the appearance of the improbable, the awkward, the uncomfortable, and the seemingly impossible that will often open up that which is spiritual and gracious for us…

A Christmas Grace

Dear God;

Whatever else be lost among the years, let us keep Christmas a shining thing:

Whatever doubts assail us, or what fears-Let us hold close one day, remembering

Its poignant meaning for the hearts of all mankind

Let us get back our childlike faith again.

Grace Neil Crowell

The Christmas Prayer of Pope John XXIII

O sweet child of Bethlehem, grant that we might share, with all our hearts, in the profound mystery of Christmas. Put into the hearts of {men and women} the desire for peace which the world seeks so desperately, and the peace that only an understanding of you can give.

Help us to know each other better, and to live as brothers and sisters of the same God. Reveal to them your beauty, holiness and purity. Awaken in their hearts, the love and gratitude for your infinite goodness.

Join them together in Your love. And give us Thy heavenly peace.   AMEN

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Learning from Rosh-Hashanah: Insights for Personal Change

                      The Reverend Peter Edward Lanzillotta, Ph.D.

As most of you are well aware, the Jewish holiday of Rosh-Hashanah marks the beginning of the New Year 5771, in the traditional Jewish culture. It signals the beginning of the agricultural year and the beginning point for life in a synagogue, a community or a congregation.

According to ancient traditions, the timing of a year runs from harvest to harvest, not seeding time. Paradoxically, it marks the beginning of the year by the act of reaping what the individual and the community has sown previously in and through their lives. So the function is twofold: It is the time for personal beginnings, and then it acts as an impulse for renewal through sincere repentance, acting as a time for reconciliation and forgiveness. In the Jewish faith, there are ten days that humanity sets aside to earnestly seek to repair its relationship with God in order to preserve righteousness and justice, thereby maintaining our hope and promise for the future. As a point for comparison, in our contemporary Western culture, we can begin to compare the rites and rituals associated with Rosh-Hashanah with our modern New Year’s observance combined with some of the Christian motives from Lent.

Rosh-Hashanah is the first of the ten High Holy days in the Jewish year, and it is celebrated as a truly significant and remarkable day in the history of the Jewish people.  On this day, according to various stories and traditions, The Lord God began the creation of the world, when Abraham offered up Isaac, his son, as a faith-filled sacrifice, when Jacob, the father of the twelve tribes of Israel was born. In addition, this was also the day when Moses confronted the Pharaoh and signaled the start of the Exodus, and it was the day that the prophet Samuel received his call!   Quite an incredible and remarkable day!

According to Jewish tradition, the ten days that span Rosh Hashanah to Yom Kippur are the days when the Book Of Life is opened and when each person’s life is reviewed and weighed. During this time, your lifetime ledger or your moral balance sheet is studied— time when our merits and our faults are examined and our coming fate measured out to us for the next year– according to our actions and aligned to our good deeds. Every act is accounted for– not a single facet of our lives is overlooked. It is on the strength and merit of what we have done, or have left undone, that we will be judged and given our rewards…

As a corollary, during this ten day time period, we are also given the opportunity to cancel our debts and reconcile our faults by enacting or carrying through on works of forgiveness, kindness, and charity. By making a sincere pledge of personal reform, we can balance our books, and be restored to righteousness, peace and wholeness.

Now starts our time of reaping the present, and sowing towards the future…  We will need an awareness of history before acting in the present, and we will have to mourn the loss of what was, before acting in the here and now…

In the Jewish tradition, the holy days of appraisal and judgment will start with an evening prayer that is a devotional history called The Shilot. This is an account of the trials and struggles of the Hebrews– used as a reverent statement that praises the faithful endurance and steadfast devotion to their God throughout all the years. Each day during the ten days of Awe, the ten days of the New Year, the faithful are summoned to collective worship by the sound of the ram’s horn or the Shofar. This trumpeting sounds the call to the faithful to “look within the depths of their souls and the core of their society, and appraise our motives carefully. We are called to prepare our actions and behaviors to change-to leave the old ways of sin and selfishness behind and return their hearts to God.]”

The rites and rituals of the ten days from Rosh-Hashanah through to Yom Kippur declare to us that it is in the act of remembrance, that we first begin to change.

The challenge and the promise of the Jewish New Year can be ours today. We, as religious liberals, can use this or a similar time period as a time for our personal reevaluation; a time period when we can begin to appraise our lives and our communities, and to instigate the initial steps of change that leads us to reconciliation and renewal. For the devout Jew, the challenge is this:

To be able to say that I have not unfaithfully wasted a single day. The promise he or she would receive in return is one of continued mercy and forgiveness. The then Book Of Life can be favorably inscribed with his or her name for the coming year– and they would be included among the names of the faithful. For each of us here today, the day of Rosh-Hashanah can spark the opportunity to release our past, solidify our present, and begin our futures.

How does this ancient time of ritual observances relate to us today?? According to some of the most prevalent spiritual and psychological theories, it is a highly recommended practice that each of us takes some time to periodically assess the progress and direction of our lives. While this is a process that can be done alone, some people decide to enlist the assistance of a friend, your community and its greater ministry, a therapist or a spiritual director as a skilled facilitators for your insights.

Others choose a more solitary route, one that might include self-assessment tests, journal keeping, dream logs, and other helpful techniques. It is also the ideal time for taking up various spiritual disciplines such as yoga, prayer, meditation, fasting, etc.

The ten days of the Jewish New Year asks us, invites us to be introspective: to carefully appraise the use of our time, our work, and the quality of all of our relationships, etc. …. The value of such reflective inner work for the quality of one’s life cannot be overestimated.

As a close comparison, professionals in the fields of human growth, change, and motivation attest to the need to have steps by which we first openly choose to experience change. They conclude that being willing and able to adjust to these necessary changes is generally considered to be a positive sign of emotional halth, maturity, and well being.

Each of us has had their share of triumph and tears, joys and sorrows, each of us can or has already experienced times, events, and emotions that calls us to a deeper, more soulful understandings; its wisdom reveals the fuller, richer meaning those experiences might hold for us. We know that all of our experiences, whether they are personally chosen or culturally imposed, have contributed greatly to the understanding of who and what and where we are today.

According to theorists, purposeful, or deep change that follows these more personal and spiritual directions, often goes through three general stages… They are: first, Mourning, second, Stabilization and last, Anticipation.

Each stage is a part of the whole cycle of change. From them we can resolve our past, secure our present, and plan for our future. They are circular and progressive, and these stages are interdependent much like the cycles within the whole Jewish year.

The progress towards meaningful change begins first with a mourning period. This is an introspective time when we ask ourselves those deeper questions about what has happened to us, and how we can make the best of it… It is also the time when we seek answers for what might have been, and how we can restore, if possible, those best possibilities and potentials. The mourning period, then, is a time for remembrance and for release; a time for forgiving, accepting, and for letting go.

Taking the time to consciously mourn enables us to look back, and if we allow it, it will stir or raise some acute reminders that can serve to instruct and guide us, and in some instances, even serve to protect us from repeating the same painful or negative patterns. If we are storing or harboring any lingering resentments, unresolved guilt, shame or remorse, this is the time for courage and compassion so that we can see through these flaws and faults and to begin to turn them into flare and facets… When we are willing to work through our past perceptions and former experiences, we can begin to make sense of them, identify and redirect them, bringing to ourselves more peace of heart and mind about our choices and the course our lives have taken so far…

If we try to avoid, omit, postpone or gloss over this period of vital reworking, we can risk adding to our storehouse of emotional debts, discomfort and dependencies– we must assure ourselves that we are not just rehearsing some past negative pattern, and that we are striving to go past sentiment to understanding. Religiously and personally, we need to avoid getting stuck in asking those futile questions of “If Only… How Come? Why?

When we adopt the attitude that our task is to behold the truth, and to discover the essential soulful lessons of wisdom, compassion, and insight that these experiences also contain, then the benefits of newly found freedom will outweigh whatever discomfort or the pangs of conscience that we have raised. This act of remembrance, when we work to identify our true selves-

will lead to greater self esteem, acceptance, integrity, growth, and maturity.

In the ritual observance of the Jewish Holy days, we are given this precious and sacred time to begin to seek forgiveness, mend any old wounds, and restore any disharmony among families and friends. …. Regardless if you find yourself mourning your youth, your parents, your religious upbringing, lovers, career failures, and other losses, slights, insults and injuries, we can be freed of their burdens in knowing that each of us shares a similar story and that these struggles are all a part of our human existence. This is the perpetual theological battle and the ongoing spiritual imperative that faces each of us: To get ON with our lives, to forgive, let go, to renew, and intentionally make forward steps again….

The second stage or plateau stage is called stabilization. Here we begin to build on what we have learned, what we have resolved from our past, and begin to mindfully apply it to our present situation and to our daily living and interactions. It involves living in “the here and now,” as we informed by the lessons of our past.

It can be a waiting period that assesses and evaluates the next steps in our lives, for it holds the glimmer of promise that lies in our future. This time of reassessing is highly individual- it could be days, weeks, months, even years depending on the intensity and the importance of the next steps. The duration will often be in proportion to our willingness and our readiness to make those changes we find ourselves required to make. Stabilization is also a waiting time that asks us to develop sufficient motivation to seek out and discover ways to infuse our lives with the courage to apply wholeheartedly the truth of our self-discoveries.

Since this theory was taught to me during training in family therapy, I will give you an example from that context: People who have just been widowed or divorced might involve themselves in a flurry of social and intimate relationships.

This activity, while appearing to be healing and resourceful, can effectively avoid the need to step back and appraise their attitudes, and their realistic needs. They need to take time to examine their deeper values  concerning who I will become involved with the next time, and if they refuse to look inward, they could prematurely sentence themselves to live out or marry the same mistakes!

Without giving proper time to mourning, and to regaining a sense of self and its stability, we can unwittingly set ourselves up for avoidable difficulties. In a similar way, we humans also have the tendency to lose ourselves in our work, our children, our friends, even in our hobbies!

That over-commitment keeps us from giving ourselves the sufficient time to heal and to truly reevaluate. Following in the Jewish tradition, the central question is this: Can we ever be too involved that we cannot take the time to repair our own self-respect, our relationship with God? Enough time to look at ourselves, and to outgrow the negatives in our past? I consider it an elaborate deception that we can play on ourselves, and I feel that each of us needs to ponder- to reflect on our lives deeply and often! d From my own life experiences, I know that it can be a long, intricate, and demanding struggle to let go of our past and to secure an objective, loving appreciation of ourselves and others. Remember, there are no easy ways or convenient answers, cheap remedies- but there are first steps…

These steps generate hope which comes from our willingness to change, to risk openness, and to see through any obstacles towards wisdom and toward a greater appreciation of others that renews one’s love for life again.

Lastly, Anticipation is the third stage in personal change. It is the readiness to invite newness, to risk involvement, and to respond positively to the possibilities of our future. This final stage welcomes opportunity, new discoveries, and new people back into our lives in deeper and more meaningful ways. Anticipation allows and encourages us to reach out, to explore, to risk and to welcome the new developments of trust, intimacy, and love.

The goal of this concluding stage is to adopt an attitude of holy innocence- one that accepts life for what it is- warts and all- which does include the risk of potential heartache and disappointment- but that is willing to reach for what life offers, and not be swayed by past doubts and previous anxieties. Here the emphasis is on how you can live more freely, apart from your earlier beliefs, limits and fears. It is from this savoring of life, this anticipation of the good, that we grow, learn, and love anew.

In the attentive and sacred observance of time between Rosh-Hashanah and Yom Kippur, we are given an appropriate ritual that symbolizes these stages of growth and change.  It is a ritual of redemption and of forgiveness that assists our mourning of the past, and encourages our ability to make ourselves ready for the future. It is an ancient ritual referred to in the Book of Micah (7:18-20), and it is designed  to release remorse and regret and to begin our journey towards greater wholeness, reconciliation and peace. It is called the Talhish.

I invite you to perform this ritual sometime during this early Fall season… Remembering that this is an act that is designed for your spiritual and personal renewal, treat it reverently. Use its steps to initiate and support changes and reforms in your life. Employ its inner messages as a rich investment in your happiness and in your spiritual growth. It is a sacred act, and a promise and a gift that you give to yourself. May we all learn through looking at ourlives, and begin again with a clean slate, an open mind, a willing spirit, and a courageous heart…   AMEN. SALAT. SO BE IT!

The Talhish  (Micah 7:18-20)

1) In order to perform this rite, you will need a slice of bread and access to some body of flowing water. This water can be a stream, a river, a canal. The ocean or lakes that have tides also work) You can choose to do this alone or with family and friends. Take this bread with you to the water’s edge. Clear your mind of any unnecessary thoughts… Breathe deeply and relax…

2) Let this bread you hold signify your life so far… See it as the result of many forces, decisions, and experiences. Know that you too were kneaded and baked into your present form and shape, and you, too have been charred or have been bleached, encrusted with life’s lessons. Let this bread symbolize the collection of your past flaws and faults, experiences and reactions. Imagine that it represents you: Body, Mind, and Spirit.

3) Extend the slice of bread before you at the water’s edge. (If you can wade in, or go to the edge of the pier, do so, etc.) Then silently and methodically crumple and shred the slice into many pieces; seeing each piece as a past problem, hurt, or fault. Now allow this assortment of broken dreams, promises, remorse, and regrets to drift off your hands or cast them out into the waters…

4) Gaze into the water… Look at the pieces… See the water as actively cleansing and releasing your heart and soul of those past cares and worries. Observe how each of the reminders vanish. Watch them float, then sink into the tides and turns of an ever-changing reality.

5) Now rest in the thought of your new freedom found in releasing the past, and then solemnly promise or pray to reform your old ways, and to resist falling back into negative habits of thinking or feeling. Claim this time as sacred time; the start of your personal renewal. See this act as a rededication to the vitality of life and the promise of expanded sense of love and caring that includes all that surrounds you. Make this pledge to yourself. Share with others only if you choose, and resolve to make this reconciliation more active, more present in your life. Beginning today, you can make your world a happier, healthier, and holier place. …

The Talhish  (Micah 7:18-20)

1) In order to perform this rite, you will need a slice of bread and access to some body of flowing water. This water can be a stream, a river, a canal. The ocean or lakes that have tides also work) You can choose to do this alone or with family and friends. Take this bread with you to the water’s edge. Clear your mind of any unnecessary thoughts… Breathe deeply and relax…

2) Let this bread you hold signify your life so far… See it as the result of many forces, decisions, and experiences. Know that you too were kneaded and baked into your present form and shape, and you, too have been charred or have been bleached, encrusted with life’s lessons. Let this bread symbolize the collection of your past flaws and faults, experiences and reactions. Imagine that it represents you: Body, Mind, and Spirit.

3) Extend the slice of bread before you at the water’s edge. (If you can wade in, or go to the edge of the pier, do so, etc.) Then silently and methodically crumple and shred the slice into many pieces; seeing each piece as a past problem, hurt, or fault. Now allow this assortment of broken dreams, promises, remorse, and regrets to drift off your hands or cast them out into the waters…

4) Gaze into the water… Look at the pieces… See the water as actively cleansing and releasing your heart and soul of those past cares and worries. Observe how each of the reminders vanish. Watch them float, then sink into the tides and turns of an ever-changing reality.

5) Now rest in the thought of your new freedom found in releasing the past, and then solemnly promise or pray to reform your old ways, and to resist falling back into negative habits of thinking or feeling. Claim this time as sacred time; the start of your personal renewal. See this act as a rededication to the vitality of life and the promise of expanded sense of love and caring that includes all that surrounds you. Make this pledge to yourself. Share with others only if you choose, and resolve to make this reconciliation more active, more present in your life. Beginning today, you can make your world a happier, healthier, and holier place. …

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